The Open Heart Chronicles

FINDING ME AGAIN by Amber Garza:

I know most people don’t find the love of their life at sixteen. But I did. At least that’s what I thought when I fell in love with Tripp Bauer. That’s why it was so hard when we drifted apart after high school graduation.

But I’ve never stopped loving him.

On a trip back to our hometown, I run into Tripp and the spark between us is undeniable.

Is it possible for us to find our way together again? Will I really get the happily ever after I’ve longed for?

Don’t miss the stunning conclusion to Tripp and Hadley’s story!

CONSEQUENCE by Shelly Crane:

Maggie and Caleb are married, leaders of their people, parents to their children, and happier than they ever dreamed, even with the visions they saw of it to prove it so. The council is still rebelling against Maggie’s changes, but this time it’s different. It’s almost as if something…or someone is behind them, pulling the strings and making decisions for them.

And Maggie is having strange visions that only she can see, leaving Caleb helpless to help her. But when her visions start to warn her that their daughter, Ava, will one day be in danger, they’ll do anything it takes to find out what’s going on and how to stop it, even paying a visit to a previous Visionary.

Maggie and Caleb must find out who or what is behind it all and stop them before Maggie is one vision too late.

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HEART BREAKER by Lila Felix:

Breaker James isn’t the boy who is imprisoned in his home anymore. He’s not the guy who is afraid to leave the house. He doesn’t need Ash twenty four hours a day anymore.

Hell, he might not need her anymore at all.

He’s a heart breaker, pure and simple.

Love is easy when you’re secluded from the world within four walls.

Ash now has to learn how to let Breaker love her—without being his crutch.
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ALWAYS by Amity Hope:

~Always is a companion novella to Ditched.

Now that Holly and Max are finally together, life in Harmony Bay should be nearly perfect. Their first Valentine’s Day together is quickly approaching. Between school, interfering family, and long lost friends that have reappeared it has the potential to turn into a complete disaster.

Or it could turn into the kind of night that neither of them will ever forget.
~~~
BREATHLESS MAGIC by Rachel Higginson: 

And they lived happily ever after…

Or that was supposed to be how the story ended. Unfortunately for Eden Kendrick, a new enemy threatens her beloved Kingdom, one more dangerous and deadly than ever before.

After enjoying a deliciously elongated honeymoon, Eden returns to the Citadel with her husband and happiness intact. She’s unexpectedly pregnant, but that’s just one more blessing to add to her blooming happiness.

Eden’s heart is full and her endless life has never been more happy. That is until Dmitri Terletov returns from the dead and threatens everyone she loves and the Kingdom she worked so hard to build.

This time around, Eden is supposed to be shielded from the conflict. She has her growing babies to protect now and Kiran wants her as far from the battle as possible. Although she’s a little stir-crazy with idle hands, she agrees that keeping away from Terletov and his deadly experiments is definitely the right course of action.

Unfortunately, Terletov doesn’t agree. And when he arrives at the Castle, uninvited and desperate for the Magic Eden once stole from him, she has no choice but to fight once again to save the people she was born to protect.
~~~

DERIVE by Jamie Magee:

Aden, son of Tarek, is a seer—an elite member of The Selected which stands guard before The Fall, the border between light and dark realities. Darkness was foretold at his birth along with the words ‘lavender waters will set you free.’ What Aden assumed to be a mythical prophecy, is eventually manifested in a ravishing beauty with long, lavender hair.

Skylynn had seen their future, the sacrifice and divide set before them. She told him they had three days—three days before they must part to meet in a distant future. Aden dares to challenge the limits set before him by empowering his innocent lover with words and energy as he plots to face the darkness predicted before it claims her—and their rightful future together.

Rain's Reviews: Wide Open by Shelly crane

Wide Open by Shelly Crane

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Milo is trouble.

He lives it, breathes it. He embraces anything that numbs and takes his mind somewhere else, a world where his mother is herself and not just a shell, and his brother didn't almost kill her, severing any relationship they had. But more importantly, Milo drowns out the guilt for leaving his mother and not being able to forgive his brother. He drowns his pride and moves on to another girl and another party, pretending that life isn't moving on around him and he's stuck in the same place. He's stuck in the past and doesn't know how to let go.

Maya is trouble.

She's done the party scene and has had her fair share of close calls and handcuffs. Not the kinky kind. She's so over it all and fought like hell for that life to let go so she could move on. She now works as a teen counselor. Her life is better, but her life is empty. She has no one but her brother in the whole world left and he's sick with a disease that no medicine can cure.

When they meet, a romance that scares them both emerges, but the love you fight for is the love that can mend bridges, heal scars, and open closed hearts. They'll need each other, they'll want each other, they'll have each other.

But will it all come too late?~Goodreads

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Review

Wide Open was surprisingly good, and I only say surprisingly because of it New Adult rating. I have always tried to avoid New Adult because of the inappropriateness of the romance but when this came out I did some research and decided to put it on probation. And when I started reading it, I didn’t stop.

Milo is a self loathing and hopeful guy. He has put himself through Hades and now that he has finally pulled himself back out he’s convinced that no one can love him, forgive him, or look at him without hating him and what he’s done. But despite this negative streak it doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to be forgiven or loved. And in those moments and actions when he is being the best guy he can be, when he’s not thinking of all his screw ups. and how horrible he thinks he is you love him so much it breaks your heart to see him ridicule himself. He is the sweetest most caring guy towards Maya that you can’t wait to see him fit all his pieces back together.

Maya has a past she isn’t proud of and secrets she doesn’t want anyone to know no matter how close she is to them. She is so strong and so broken your heart breaks all over again. ( All I’m saying is Shelly crane must get pleasure from making her readers depressed.) She has been sober for four years but her life isn’t getting easier and her future is looking impossible. She is defeated-or so she thinks. But when Milo walks in- well- you’ll have to swoon for yourself.

Milo and Maya are possibly the most tragic story and heart-felt story Mrs. Crane has ever written and I am so, so pleased I didn’t pass it up.

The New adult rating is mainly for issues with drugs and alcohol. The romance did not go al the way but did get fairly steamy.

~Rain

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Quotes

"There is something seeing and something being seen."

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Links

Goodreads

Amazon
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Blog Tour: Wide Open by Shelly Crane

Wide Open by Shelly Crane

Milo

My mouth tasted like vomit. That wasn't unusual. The arm creeping over my middle wasn't unusual either nor the way I felt completely repulsed and sick. I worked so hard, drinking, doing any drug that I could get my hands on, sleeping with any girl that looked in my direction and didn't slap me for my foul mouth as I told her all the things I wanted to do to her. Slurred, really.

I knew it wouldn't be long until Mason was there to pick me up. The small get-togethers, he wouldn't get wind of, but the big ones, he always came and tried to save me. It had been about a month since I'd seen him. He just didn't get it. I didn't want to be saved.

At least, not at first.

I hated him. I hated him with every fiber of my being for what he did to Mom. I couldn't stand to look at him let alone live with the bastard. So I started going out all the time just to get away from him, only seeing Mom during the day when I skipped school and Mason was at work.

But she never remembered me the right way, so it was pointless to keep seeing her. I just tortured myself by staying there and I wouldn't feel guilty for leaving. Finally, I spent so much time away that it felt like I didn't live there anyway and stopped going home.

Mason texted me so much that I eventually just tossed my cell out of the window of my friend's car one night. They laughed and laughed, whooping and telling me how free I was. We smoked enough dope to chill for the next day and a half. I never went back to school after that. I never went back home either. Why would I? No one understood me, no one really cared about me. They all just wanted me to 'make something of myself'.

But how can you do that when you don't even know the parts that make you up, the parts that make you you, the parts that piece together and make you feel whole. I hadn't felt whole in a really long time. I felt older than I was. I may be a seventeen year old, but inside I felt like I was fifty.

The girl next to me groaned and dug her nails into my side just a little. "What time is it?" her raspy voice breathed against my shoulder.

I leaned over the side of the bed and lifted my phone from my pants pocket. My new cell was dead. "Don't know. Does it matter?"

"I have to work tomorrow." She yawned and stretched.

I started to get up, but she grabbed my arm. I winced at the burn on the inside of my elbow. I looked down at it, seeing the bruising from the needles under her finger tips.

"I'm outta here." I shook her hand off.

"Wait. Why so eager to get away?" She rolled over on her stomach, her naked behind peeking out from the sheet, her feet swinging back and forth in the air. "You weren't so eager to leave earlier."

I scoffed. "Passing out and wanting to stay are not the same thing."

"Sometimes they are. Sometimes it just doesn't matter." She watched as I zipped my jeans, commando. "I'll cook you breakfast," she bribed.

I paused. I couldn't even remember the last time I'd eaten. I was so thin that I had to belt my pants to keep them up. I always crashed wherever I was or with a friend, ate whatever came my way, but sometimes it didn't come very often. For all intents and purposes, I was homeless, but had yet to sleep outside.

At her mention of food, my stomach decided to throw a fit. "What do you want for it?"

"Got any blow?"

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the little baggie. "Some."

"Split it with me," she said, biting her lip and sitting to let the sheet fall away. I stared at her chest since she was offering the view. She slithered up to me, unzipping my pants as she pressed her lips to my ear and said, "Come back to bed for a while, we'll hit the blow, and after, I'll make you some eggs."

"Why do you want me to stay?" I asked, not really caring, but wondering why she was offering me more sex and breakfast.

"Because," she pushed my pants down my hips, "my parents will be gone 'til tomorrow morning and there's nothing better than sex after a hit."

I watched as she took the baggie from me with her fake nails. She leaned forward and kissed my cheek before dipping her pinkie nail in and sniffing the little she took up her nose. She put her finger back in the bag and I took it, rubbing what was left of the powder on my gums.

Normally, I would have bolted, but I didn't have anywhere else to go anyway. The promise of food was almost as satisfying as the sex I was about to have.

She set up the lines and after we did them, one after the other, she pushed me down on the bed and straddled me. I rolled with the drugged ecstasy that crawled slowly through my veins as she groaned and moaned on top of me.

And that was how Mason found me.

The door opened and my head fuzzed over as I turned to look at him. His eyes locked on mine before he turned away, but not before I saw the disgust on his face. I gripped the girls hips to make her stop since someone coming into the room wasn't a clear enough cue for her. I pushed her off onto the bed and sat up, scooting to the edge.

I stared at his back in the doorframe. "Leave. I don't need you here."

"You do, Milo," he said before turning. He looked and he saw all there was left of me. I suddenly felt like I was wide open for him to see it all, for him to see all the rot and gore inside me. He shook his head, his eyes searching my face. "God, help me. You do need me."

I scowled. "No, I-"

"Milo…when's the last time you ate something?" He rubbed his hair. I noticed how good he looked. He looked like he'd gained some weight, the good kind. His arms and torso were bigger, new tattoos peeking out from his shirt sleeves. I realized it had been weeks since I'd seen him.

I stood and yanked my jeans on, spitting my words, hating how good he looked, knowing that he was happy with that girl that I'd seen before. "None of your fu-"

"Milo!" he scolded, just as a hand crawled around his arm. The girl - his girl - looked around him, the sympathy pouring off her in droves as she looked at me. He touched her arm, his fingers caressing, smoothing. He looked back at me. "Don't use that filthy mouth with Emma here."

She gulped as she looked at me. Her eyes lingered on my stomach before she looked up at my face. She smiled, just barely. "I've got some hot coffee in the car if you like mocha," she offered.

He looked at her again as she came to his side. They barely fit in the doorframe together. He circled her waist with his arm, looking strung out and guilty. It angered me that he felt like he deserved her or anything else that would make him happy. "Trying to lure me out with hot coffee," I mused angrily. "Wow, Mason. Getting the girl to do your dirty work for you."

"Milo," he snapped.

"It's my coffee," she smoothed over, "but you're welcome to it. I haven't drank any yet."

She rubbed his chest and he sighed. He looked at me again, renewed determination in his eyes. "Let us take you to get some food at least. Anything you want."

"No." I searched for my shirt and tugged it on roughly. I realized it was inside-out too late, but left it. I didn't care.

"Come on, Milo. You can still hate me, but do it while you're eating something." I gave him a droll look. "Milo…you look like hell, bro."

"Aw, thanks," I sneered.
"I'm serious," he said quietly. "Please, Milo."

He begged me. He had never begged before, just ordered me around, dragging me to my room, and then I'd sneak out before he woke up. He'd never tried to feed me before.

"Come with us, Milo," his girl asked. "There's an omelet place five minutes from here that's pretty amazing."

I gritted my teeth. I didn't want his charity. As if she read my mind his girl said, "I'm buying."

She smiled and tilted her head. I sighed, sticking my dirty-socked feet inside my boots without tying them. "Whatever. I eat, then I'm out." I looked over at them and glared. "Don't try to stop me from leaving."

"We won't," she insisted. She rubbed Mason's arm and looked up at him sadly. She looked as if she were about to cry. I had no idea why. It couldn't be for me. I didn't even know this chick.

I lead the way from the room. The girl I'd left on the bed yelled something at us. I could tell she was mad, not understanding what was going on, but I just kept walking. I was pissed, really, because she had gotten my last hit and I hadn't gotten off before Mason interrupted us.

Mason's car wasn't parked on the street. I looked for it, but blondie passed me and went to a big truck in the driveway. He got a new truck? How the heck did he have money for that?

I didn't say a word as I climbed into the backseat. She handed me the coffee and I snatched it from her hands, tossing the lid off, and gulping it down. It burned my tongue and lips, but my fogged brain was past the point of caring or stopping. As I finished it, I watched as she scooted all the way over to press against his side. They whispered things back and forth that I couldn't hear. The drive was short. Blondie had been right about that. We piled into a booth in the back, them on one side and me on the other, and I didn't even pick up the menu.

It pissed me off just smelling the food. My stomach growled so loud and hard it hurt. I was cold and rubbed my neck. When the waitress came, I ordered a root beer and a western omelet with cheese and hashbrowns. Mason ordered the same and the girl got waffles.

Before an awkward silence could settle in, she started talking. "I'm Emma, by the way." She smiled. I stared at their intertwined hands on the tabletop. Mason had never had a girlfriend before, really. He wasn't the touchy-feely type either. I was oddly fascinated at the way his thumb ran over her knuckles, over and over.

"Hi, Emma," I spouted sarcastically and let my gaze settle on her face instead.

She was one of those girls who was gorgeous by design and didn't even have to try. Her eyes, her nose, her cheeks. They all seemed to fit so perfectly. Her lips - they were Mason's favorite thing, other than her legs, which I knew were his absolute favorite. He'd always been a legs man. And she had some nice twigs on her, from what I'd seen. I settled my eyes lower on the barely-there sliver of cleavage that peeked from her top.

It was the first time I'd seen a girl blush in what felt like years. The girls I kept company with didn't blush. They were beyond that point, beyond the level that allowed them to feel embarrassed about sexual things. They'd done it all.

This girl… I shook my head and smirked at Mason. "Not sampled the goods yet, brother? She's mighty skittish."

"Shut your face, Milo," he stood and growled.

I was actually taken aback a little. This was as worked up as I'd ever seen him. And over a girl of all things? Holy crap. He was in love with this chick. I felt my hatred soften a little before snapping it back in place. I rubbed my neck again on that itchy, cold spot.

"Whoa, Nelly," I joked. "Calm the eff down. It was just an observation."

I laughed. It sounded strange even to my ears. It sounded like a sick person's laugh. I glanced at Emma and actually felt a little bad at the embarrassed way she tucked her hair behind her ears. I squinted. Was there a story there that I didn't know?

"I'm Milo," I mocked. "Nice to meet you, princess."

"We've met before and you know it," she countered easily.

"Yeah," I muttered and rubbed my cold neck. "I remember. You held my hair back as I puked." I laughed condescendingly.

"Basically." She smiled, not falling for my ploys to piss her off. "You're welcome, by the way."

I didn't respond to the beauty queen. I just pointlessly stirred my root beer. She was beautiful to the point of distraction, sweet and annoying all wrapped up in one, and I could tell that she had my brother wrapped around her finger whether she knew it or not.

And it pissed me off. Mason shouldn't be so freaking happy.

And he was, I could tell. He watched her when she wasn't looking. His entire presence shifted when she did. The waitress brought our food soon thankfully, and just as I was taking a bite, I saw the ring on Emma's finger.

"You're getting married?" I heard my gravelly voice say.

Emma pulled her hands off the table into her lap, as if unsure if I was supposed to know that. Mason lifted his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close, kissing her temple. It shocked the hell out of me how much I wanted to be happy for him.

"Yeah," he said low. "I asked Emma to marry me."

I didn’t ask when or how. I didn’t care.

"And she said yes," he continued harder.

"That's great," I spouted sarcastically with a mouthful of food.

"And mom's doing fine, too, by the way."

"I didn't ask," I growled and took another bite. I could see I was going to have to get out of here so the food-shoveling kicked up a notch.

"She has a nurse that comes and helps take care of her. I work with her every day on her exercises, but she still can't walk. She and Emma get along great, too. Emma was one of my patients and lost her memory as well."

I jerked my gaze up to the beauty queen. She was watching me with parted lips, her eyes practically begging me to give in to Mason and stop the feud. I wondered if she knew what Mason had done, how Mason had-

Mason leaned forward and glared as he barked, "Don't look at her like that. And yes, I told her all about me. How I'm the devil that destroyed your life and Mamma's. How I killed my best friend." She gripped his arm, tugging on it and pleading with him to stop. "She knows it all."

They stared at each other and I believed him that they had talked about it. It looked like they had talked about it plenty, in fact, but I could also tell that she kissed his boo-boos and made him think that it was all OK.

But it wasn't.

I chugged my root beer and grabbed both pieces of toast, wrapped them in a napkin and stuck them in my pocket, scooting down the bench seat. "I'm out here."

"Will you just eat, Milo," Mason said in exasperation. "I'm not going to make you come home. Just eat."

"You couldn't make me," I spat. I stood and leaned right in his face with my palms on the table. "Always trying to run my life. Good ol' Mason." I saw him flinch slightly at that. He stood, too, licking his lips angrily in an attempt to calm himself. "I hate you so much. You killed our mother."

"Our mother is alive," he replied loudly.

People in the restaurant were now privy to our conversation, but I went even louder. "What she is isn't alive! When she doesn't even remember me?"

"She remembers you," he countered.

"Not in the right way."

"She remembers you in the most important way. In the only way that truly matters."

"What could be worse than her not remembering me as I am?"

"Not remembering you at all," Emma said, barely. She looked up, her eyes dark. "When I woke up from my coma, I didn't remember anyone. Not my parents, or my friends, even the guy I had been dating. I still don't." Mason sighed as if all of this was exhausting. "It could be worse, Milo. She could not remember you at all."

"Doesn't matter," I steamed ahead, unwilling to let them deter me. "The fact is that you ruined my mom. It's pointless to even go see her because she won't remember that I've been there."

"Doesn't matter," he spouted back at me. "Doesn't negate the fact that you should come see her."

"Ooh," I mocked. "Using big words on little high school drop-out Milo. Whatever."

I turned to go, scratching my cold neck and feeling the rawness of my skin begin to set in. He grabbed my arm and before I knew it, I was looking at Mason holding his jaw as he leaned back against the table. Emma fussed over the blood coming from his lip with insistent ministrations with a napkin. I hadn't even realized I hit him until my hand started to ache. The entire diner was watching us with these looks of disgust on their faces. Well, they were watching me.

I shook out my fingers, wincing but not regretting it. I turned to go once more and heard Mason from behind me. "I love you, bro." That stopped me in my tracks. I didn't turn around. "I love you and I know that you won't ever forgive me. It took me a long time to forgive me, too. I would still hate me if Emma hadn't come along and showed me that I couldn't blame myself forever. It was an accident, nothing but. I not only lost my best friend that day because he wouldn't listen to me and drove anyway, and my mom, the way she was, but I lost you, too. I take care of Mom; I became a physical therapist to take care of her. But you, I don't know what to do for you, Milo. I don't know how to help you. If you ever need anything or want to come home, the door's always wide open. Always. I love you, even if you can't love me back."

I hated the fact that he made me want to turn around, to make-up and forget everything that happened.

I hated him. I hated all he'd done. I hated how he tried to reconcile every time I saw him. And I hated that he was getting this great, perfect little life with a wife and kids.

I didn't look back again as I weaved through the tables on my way out. He yelled my name and something about giving me some money. I should have taken it and would have had it been anyone else. But I didn't want his money.

I walked for a long time to a friend's apartment over the Irish Mug bar. Not only would he let me crash, but more than likely he had some smoke he'd front me. After Mason's little haphazard intervention, I needed it. I crossed the street to the bar and heard the honking before seeing the bright lights. I raised my hand and saw the car screeching to a stop right in front of me. He cursed and honked. I flipped him off and kept walking across the road. I heard him peel away as I climbed the stairs on the side of the building for his apartment. The bar was hopping, the music was so loud I couldn't even hear my footsteps up the stairs.

I knocked, but knew he couldn't hear me, so I tried the handle. When it turned, I pushed it open. He had called me a few times, but I never checked my messages. My phone was just a drug ferry basically. I never used it except for making a drug buy or find a friend's how to stay at because minutes cost too much for someone who never had money. I had odd jobs sometimes, but after you don't show up on time for a few days in a row, they can you. That was the only way I could buy minutes and buy weed on a regular basis. But usually, I floated until my next paycheck, whenever that may be, and some friends would front me some things if I didn't have the money.

But I was a little behind right now and owed a few people. OK, a lot of people, and a lot of money. Even my friend I was going to see had threatened to cut me off if I didn't pay him something. I usually just avoided the ones I owed money to.

I'd gotten into the other side of the business a couple times, but didn't sell much of it when I smoked it or snorted it instead. I had my foot broken once for not paying up when they realized the drugs were all gone and it was me who had used them.

I still walked with a little limp because I couldn't go to the hospital without them calling Mason or my mom. So my friend put a makeshift cast on me and I practically dragged the thing for a few weeks.

Nikko's place was dark and I couldn't hear anything but the noise below us. I turned the corner to find him on the couch, some girl on his lap. I turned around to keep her naked behind out of my sight. I heard him curse.

"Milo! What the hell, man?"

"Sorry, uh…" I peeked back, but it was still too soon and turned back around. "I wanted to see if I could crash here."

"Damn it, Milo…" He kissed her, I heard the smacking, and told her he'd see her later, that he needed to take care of something. She walked by me and gave me a sullen look for ruining her night. I turned to find him pulling a black wife-beater on. "Dude, you can't just come in like that."

"I knocked. The music's too loud." I stuffed my hands into my pockets. "Let me crash, OK?"

"Milo." He shook his head. "You look like a heap of hell, man."

"That's because I haven't had anything all day and my nosey brother wanted to flaunt his hot girlfriend in my face."

He sighed. "There's nothing wrong with getting lit on the weekends and making a living off of selling, but you...you're not just having fun anymore. You're hooked. You're hooked, messing with deals you shouldn't, and people are looking for you." He took a step forward, but looked at me sadly. "I tried to help you. I knew you had it rough at home, but…you can't stay here, man. Go."

Oh. It wasn't sadness he had for me, it was pity.

"Just for the night," I begged.

"I can't." He gulped and leaned against the kitchen bar. "Mikey's looking for you. And…so is Roz. Go. Now."

The curses piled in my head. I knew I owed him money, but for him to start actively looking for me wasn't good for my health.

But I needed a place to stay and I needed…something, anything to make me stop shaking and scratching. It felt like ants were in my veins and he needed to give me something. "Fine," I bit out. "Just…float me a J."

"You already owe me for ten joints, not to mention all the blow and nuggets I fronted you."

He looked around, nervous as all get out. My brain was in a fog. I didn't care if I slept on a bench outside. My friends usually came through for me, but lately they seemed less eager to let me stay. So fine, he could throw me out as long as he gave me something to tie me over.

"I'm good for it. My brother said he'd give me some money until I get back on my feet. I've got a job lined up starting next week," I lied. "It's just…been bad lately. I'm under so much stress."

"Classic druggie line," he scoffed. "Get out, Milo. The longer you stay here, the worst you're making it for me." We heard a car door outside and he sucked in a breath. "Go, man, now!"

I went to the window and peeked past the dingy blue curtain that the previous tenant had left and saw one of the guys who always set up my buys from Roz. I shook my head, backing away, and looked at him to help me. "Go out the back. And don't say I never did anything for you," he growled and went to the front door. "Go!"

I ran, but as soon as I opened the back door, there was another guy there. "You got Roz's money?" he asked.

I stalled and started the typical plea. "Well, I'll have it-"

He didn't wait for anything else. His fist connected to my jaw and I heard the crunch, knowing it was hurt tomorrow, as I went down. He followed me and gripped my collar in his fist before slamming my cheek with his free fist. He beat on me for so long and hard all over that I blacked out. I came out of it a couple times, but it was so blurry and the haze of pain was thick. I could never grasp onto reality.

No time passed at all for me. I closed my eyes and the next time I opened them, I was in a hospital bed. No one was there with me. It was a regular room, not the ER. I lifted my head to survey the damage and immediately regretted that hasty decision. My head hurt so badly, I thought I might black out again. I pushed with my elbows and made myself sit up. I touched my head to find a bandage, my eye was swollen, my lips all busted up, and my jaw was so sore, it hurt to even touch it, let alone try to open my mouth.

I remembered being brought there, the cops, they asked questions…

I had to get out of there.

Right then, that was the only thing that truly mattered. I had rolled over on Roz. I owed so much money to so many people, but none of that mattered compared to the fact that I told the cops Roz's operating spots and their names and everything. He was going to kill me.

I had no idea how long I'd been in the hospital and the lack of drugs made me way more lucid than the drug-induced stages I usually resided in. There wasn't any morphine in that drip because I hurt all over so badly, I thought I might vomit. The fact that they hadn't given me any morphine made me realize that they knew I was a…drug addict. There, OK, yes, if I didn't get drugs every day, I felt like I'd crawl out of my own skin. So, yes, I was addicted. And they knew it because they hadn't given me anything to help with the pain.

And I knew I was in deep.

It hit me all at once as I yanked the needle out of my arm how bad things had gotten. I'd ran myself into the ground. It had been way too long since I hadn't had anything in my system and my hands shook as I eased off the bed onto the floor. I tried to yank the hospital band off, but I was too weak. The name on the band read John Doe. So they didn't know who I was. I pulled on my jeans from the back under the bed. My body ached so bad all over, but I knew I had to get out of there.

Once all my clothes were on, I peeked out the blinds to see an officer standing by my room. I cursed under my breath. That was probably the only reason the Roz hadn't come after me. But the cops wanted me for something, and I could guess it was for me to roll over on Roz. They didn't just guard anybody; only the people who they wanted something from.

I pushed the food cart to slam into the bed and then jumped behind the door. When he opened it, like I knew he would, I waited until he came into the room. He cursed and moved forward, bending to look under the bed. I scooted behind him around the door and acted as normal as I could as I walked down the hall. I heard him on his radio as he said that the suspect was missing. Then he argued with them that he'd been by the door the whole time. I turned into the first stairwell I saw and took them as quickly as I could. I heard them coming from the lower floor and stopped. I could hear the crackle of a radio, so I jumped through the door with a peeling number four on it.

It led to an alcove in the hall and I waited for them to go up as they passed. When it was quiet, I opened the door slowly and crept my way down the stairs, out of the hospital, and into the street.

I didn't know where I was going, but I knew I had to get away. It was then that I knew I'd never see Mason or my mother again.

I went to the highway, even though it was almost dark, stuck my thumb out and waited for someone to stop and take me away - give me a ride to anywhere but there.

Two Years Later

Milo

I sat and looked at the envelope. It had the results of my GED exam. Finally, I was going to have a piece of paper that told me I had finished high school instead of just dropping out and being a runaway.

I flipped it over and over in my fingers. It wasn't like this was an application into Harvard or anything. It was a GED, but it was my GED. It was all I had.

"If you don't open that already, I'm going to stab you with my fork."

I glared up at Joey playfully. "Shut it."

Joey had been my friend for a long time now. It felt like forever, but had actually only been a little shy of two years. Joey worked at the shelter that I crawled into a few nights after I left the hospital. I hitchhiked for two days, sometimes with a ride, sometimes walking or sitting on the side of the road. I was starving, so weak I could barely walk, dehydrated except for a bottle of water a trucker gave me. They pulled me into the shelter at the church in some town.

Joey was the one who made sure I got a bed in the shelter that night and for the next two months while I tried to straighten myself out. There were many bumps in the road. I still wasn't sure exactly how many days the hospital had kept me, because I hadn't know even what day it was when I went in, but the detox had begun then. I struggled with it, but had already gotten through some of the hard part. They made it clear that drugs would not be allowed in the shelter and anyone on drugs after the rules had been explained would be removed.

To be completely honest, I fell hard off that wagon once or twice. I couldn't believe how hard it was. That first pill or sip or hit after days and days of not having anything was like pure ecstasy, my body betraying me and making me believe it was what I needed and wanted.

But Joey came and got me from wherever I was, yelled and told me how I needed to get straight, snuck me back into the shelter and made me promise never to do it again. Finally, that promise stuck. It's been over a year since that wagon had caused any problems for me.
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Southern Book Carnival

Today we are going to have a speaker(ish)! Mrs. Shelly Crane who is a 100% Southern Beauty!

Shelly is a New York Times & USA Today Bestselling author from a small town in Georgia and loves everything about the south. She is wife to a fantastical husband and stay at home mom to two boisterous and mischievous boys who keep her on her toes. They currently reside in everywhere USA as they happily travel all over with her husband's job. She loves to spend time with her family, binge on candy corn, go out to eat at new restaurants, buy paperbacks at little bookstores, site see in the new areas they travel to, listen to music everywhere and also LOVES to read.

Her own books happen by accident and she revels in the writing and imagination process. She doesn't go anywhere without her notepad for fear of an idea creeping up and not being able to write it down immediately, even in the middle of the night, where her best ideas are born.

Shelly Crane is who you have to thank for this blog. If it wasn't for her significance series I would have never gotten into reading as much as I have. Don't get me wrong I loved reading before but I always had a really hard time finding books that I'd enjoy that was age appropriate. So my spotlight today is the best author ever!

How many of you have ever played two lies and a truth? You have great! Oh you haven't, ok well it goes like this. I'm am going to tell you two lies and one truth about Shelly Crane and your going to tell me which one you think is the truth. Are you ready?

• Shelly has three kids.
• She hates cats.
• She doesn't like chocolate.

Which one do you think it is?

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Blog Tour: Smash Into You by Shelly Crane

Blog tour:

Smash Into You

By Shelly Crane

Synopsis:

Jude has spent the whole twenty one years of his life running. From what, he wasn't quite sure. His mother tried to keep him safe; a low profile, a constant move on the horizon, a week's pay always stashed away. She tried to instill in him that he was special somehow, though would never elaborate. He never felt different. He was so completely normal and vanilla that he wondered if it had all been in her head. But then she was murdered and all he saw was a running silhouette of a man as his mother said three final words to him. Three words that changed his whole being.

Never stop running…

Now he's semi-settled into a big town. The college is huge and easy to blend into. It's been three months since he had to move because 'Biloxi', as he calls the man who killed his mother, found him once more.

Then Marley, an eighteen year old girl who is as infuriating as she is blissfully ignorant of her gorgeousness, smashes into his car with hers. Then smashes into his life as he realizes that whatever it is he has that Biloxi wants, she has it, too. And now, they're after them both.

~~~

Review

Smash Into You is a smashing novel ;). It was just stunning and honest at the same time. But you might not feel like that the whole time you’re reading it. But I’ll get to that later on. Smash Into You was a joy read, don’t get me wrong. But with a jaded Jude who has been running from a nameless murder and has watched his mother die by the hands of this man. And a practical stranger get thrown into this mix by accident? Things seem to only be able to go wrong. Jude has been on the run from man and he has no idea why. Every person Jude becomes close to is at risk. Jude has been living this life on his own since he was fourteen. This life full of anger, guilt, fear, and sadness.Don’t Go and misunderstand me, Jude was a fantastic guy deep down. He was compassionate, loving, and real. Tis life would break even the best of men and Jude is doing the best he knows how to do. This is a story of Jude losing himself and this outer person he puts on. He is breaking his chains and freeing himself from this life that was chosen for him. He learns to take control and fight for what he wants. Jaded Jude really isn’t nearly as bad as he seems ;). And, yeah, you’ll have to take my word on it. Marley is a sweetie pie who has had the worst of luck. I can’t tell you too much about her. Half the fun if figuring out this mystery of a girl. I mean, I absolutely loved it. You are always reading about mysterious guys, and men who have secrets but the girl wants him anyways and I immensely loved the fact the her cards aren’t just laid out on the table in the first chapter. I will say this though, Marley is forgiving, understanding, and so darned nice. The jaded and the jewel set off on a life changing adventure with uncertain terms. This book was bloody fantastic with suspense, mystery, action, forgiveness, and revenge. I didn’t put this down till I was done (@ 3a.m.) The plot and characters were amazing and seamlessly laid out in this spectacular story. Smash Into You drags you into a lively world and you get swept up into this exciting anguish of this life. The romance and hope seems doomed to be a lie. But when determined, humans can change the rotation of the earth.  
~~~

About the Author

Shelly is a NEW YORK TIMES & USA TODAY bestselling YA author from a small town in Georgia and loves everything about the south. She is wife to a fantastical husband and stay at home mom to two boisterous and mischievous boys who keep her on her toes. She loves paperbacks, coffee, and candy corn, and to spend time with her family and friends, go out to eat at new restaurants and site see in the new areas they travel to, listen to music and also LOVES to read.
Her own books happen by accident and she revels in the writing and imagination process. She doesn't go anywhere without her notepad for fear of an idea creeping up and not being able to write it down immediately, even in the middle of the night, where her best ideas are born.

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Cover Reveal: Smash Into You (Excerpt)

 Jude has spent the whole twenty one years of his life running. From what, he wasn't quite sure. His mother tried to keep him safe; a low profile, a constant move on the horizon, a week's pay always stashed away. She tried to instill in him that he was special somehow, though would never elaborate. He never felt different. He was so completely normal and vanilla that he wondered if it had all been in her head. But then she was murdered and all he saw was a running silhouette of a man as his mother said three final words to him. Three words that changed his whole being.
          Never stop running…
          Now he's semi-settled into a big town. The college is huge and easy to blend into. It's been three months since he had to move because 'Biloxi', as he calls the man who killed his mother, found him once more.
          Then Marley, an eighteen year old girl who is as infuriating as she is blissfully ignorant of her gorgeousness, smashes into his car with hers. Then smashes into his life as he realizes that whatever it is he has that Biloxi wants, she has it, too. And now, they're after them both.


Excerpt
       And now, as I stared out into the dark rain to see a POS car sideways in the road, I knew the world hated me, had to, because someone had just smashed her car into my truck.
         I got out and braced myself. It wasn't easy to pay cash for new cars every time I needed to skip town. It was hard living when you couldn't be who you really were. Finding people to pay you under the table was almost impossible these days.
         I groaned and glared at the beauty standing at the end of my truck. "Look at that!"
         "I'm so sorry," she began. I could tell she really was, but I was beyond pissed. "I'll call my insurance company right now."
         That stopped me. "No!" I shouted and she jolted at the verbal assault. "No insurance."
         "Well," she pondered, "what do you mean? I have good insurance."
         "But I don't."
         She turned her head a bit in thought and then her mouth fell open as she realized what I was saying. "You don’t have any insurance, do you?"
         "No," I answered. "Look. Whatever, we'll just call this even-steven, because you did hit me."
         "Even-steven my butt!" she yelled and scurried to jump in front of me, blocking my way.
         "And what a cute butt it is."
         Even through the noise of water hitting metal, I heard her intake of breath. The rain pelted us in the dark. I hoped no one came around the corner. It would be hard for them to see us here in the middle of the road. She might get hurt. Then I wondered why I cared.
         "Look, buddy," she replied and crossed her arms. It drew my eyes to her shirt. My eyes bulged 'cause that shirt…well, it was see-through now. She caught on and jerked her crossed arms higher. "How dare you! You're on a roll in the jerkface department, you know that!"
         "My specialty," I said and saluted as I climbed in my truck. "Get your pretty butt in your car and let's pretend this never happened, shall we?"
         Because if cops and insurance were brought into this, I'd be on the run sooner than I thought.
         She huffed. "Excuse me-"
         "Darling. Car. Now." She glared. "Like right now."
         She threw her hands up in the air and yelled, "I knew chivalry was dead!" before climbing in her car and driving away. She didn't know it, but I was being as chivalrous as they come. I made sure she got out of the rain and back into her car, even though she didn't like the way I did it, and I got her as far away from me as I could.
         In my book, I deserved a freaking medal for being so chivalrous. Because people that stuck with me didn't live long.
         Just ask my mom.
         Oh, wait, you can't. She died long, long years ago saving my life. I refused to bring anyone onto this sinking ship with me. If it finally did go down, I was going down alone.
~~~
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Review: Wide Awake

Wide Awake - Shelly Crane

\

A girl.
A coma.
A life she can't remember.

When Emma Walker wakes up in the hospital with no knowledge of how she got there, she learns that she's been in a coma for six months. Strangers show up and claim to be her parents, but she can't remember them. She can't remember anyone. Not her friends, not even her boyfriend. Even though she can't remember, everyone wants her to just pick up where she left off, but what she learns about the 'old her' makes her start to wish she'd never woken up. Her boyfriend breaks up with the new girl he's dating to be with her, her parents want her to start planning for college, her friends want their leader back, and her physical therapist with the hazel eyes keeps his distance to save his position at the hospital.

Will she ever feel like she recognizes the girl in the mirror?-Goodreads
~~~

Emma Walker was real, relate able a little blubbery but still lovable. All in all, I really liked her. She had some, "Oma geeze don't do that!" moments but I've read worse and it always worked out (great thing about fiction, right?). She had a good head on her shoulders. And isn't the stereotypical love- sick teenager that so many other YA romance novels had. She wasn't my all time favorite heroine but I still really liked her. 

Mason was so sweet. He got a tad confusing at one point or another. Like I didn't know what box to put him in but looking back I see it made him more lifelike. You can't put real people in stereotypical boxes and expect them to fit and that is how it was with Mason. He was a great guy who was always there and had a caring heart that always puts other people first.

Wide Awake was so good! I got sucked into it and irritated when I had to put it down. Shelly Crane did an awesome job creating an interesting story with great characters and real-life scenarios. The relationships Emma had before her six month coma didn't just snap back into place. She had to work through the confusion, anger, sadness, disappointment, and everything that comes out of life-altering amnesia. It was a well rounded and a very satisfying read.

The book wasn't too sappy and when it did get super sweet there was a reason and I understood the need, which is more than I can say for some books I have read. I don't regret the $4 spent on this eBook. It'll stay on my kindle app and be read many times again. It was a refreshing read that wasn't some walking cliché. Shelly Crane is an amazing author that is going through much and still delivers breathtaking stories!
~~~
"Ahh!" he yelled in frustration and laughed sadly. "I'm trying to the right thing here. I want you to have everything you ever wanted."
"I want you. And then I want to talk about what I might want later. Whatever happens, I'm not worried." I put my hand on his shoulder and he seemed to relax a little. 

"It's not all you've got," he argued in a whisper against my fingers before pulling them away and holding my hand hostage, "you just don't know it yet." He leaned forward and kissed me in an achingly slow fashion.

Check out the book at :Godreads Amazon and Shelly Crane's Website

Wide Awake is LIVE :)

Wide Awake- Shelly Crane

A girl.

A coma.

A life she can't remember.

When Emma Walker wakes up in the hospital with no knowledge of how she got there, she learns that she's been in a coma for six months. Strangers show up and claim to be her parents, but she can't remember them. She can't remember anyone. Not her friends, not even her boyfriend. Even though she can't remember, everyone wants her to just pick up where she left off, but what she learns about the 'old her' makes her start to wish she'd never woken up. Her boyfriend breaks up with the new girl he's dating to be with her, her parents want her to start planning for college, her friends want their leader back, and her physical therapist with the hazel eyes keeps his distance to save his position at the hospital.

Will she ever feel like she recognizes the girl in the mirror?

~~~

Wide Awake By the phenominamazing Shelly Crane is here! You can look at it on goodreads, and buy it on Amazon and Smashwords. She is working on making it live on other sites but right now this is where you can get it! I loved it and the review will be up tomorrow! 'See' ya later!

~Rain